Parental Alienation and a Narcissistic Mum or dad

Kids are sometimes caught within the center within the face of a divorce or separation. Children love each of their mother and father and develop into confused and afraid after they don’t get alongside.

However what occurs when one mum or dad is a narcissist who’s adept at gaslighting and manipulation? This text will give attention to parental alienation and narcissism.

Parental Alienation

As you could bear in mind from my final put up, parental alienation is doing or saying issues by one mum or dad to their kids towards the opposite, damaging their relationship with the alienated mum or dad.

The damaging mum or dad would possibly trigger their kids to worry, reject, and even hate the focused mum or dad as they’re painted an image that’s ugly and filled with lies.


There are lots of methods to govern kids into despising their different mum or dad, together with isolating them away from the sufferer mum or dad, undermining the opposite mum or dad’s authority, asking their kids for info that’s destructive towards the opposite mum or dad, and emotionally manipulating the youngsters. By far, probably the most damaging factor executed to kids is to disclaim the focused mum or dad entry to them.

Typically, the offending mum or dad shows narcissism whereas pitting the youngsters and their different mum or dad towards one another to regulate and manipulate all concerned.


Narcissists and Their Habits in Divorce

The phrases narcissist and narcissism are improperly utilized in our society right now to explain somebody who doesn’t wish to go together with plans or to categorise somebody in different finally foolish methods. Nonetheless, narcissism is nothing to giggle about as it’s a extreme situation the place the narcissist manipulates and bullies folks to do what they need.

One other technique to describe narcissism is that it’s excessive self-involvement by an individual to a level that makes them ignore the wants of these round them. Narcissists perceive their habits however refuse to alter.

Narcissism is a trait, however typically, it’s included as a part of a extra appreciable character dysfunction referred to as narcissistic character dysfunction on a spectrum. There are some frequent traits of narcissists, together with the next.

A way of entitlement. Narcissists consider that they’re superior to others and deserve particular remedy. Additionally they suppose others ought to obey their needs and that the overall guidelines of society don’t apply to them.

When a narcissist faces a divorce, they really feel they now not have management over their ex-spouse, so that they exert strain on them through the use of the youngsters as weapons, trying to persuade them their different mum or dad is unhealthy.

Manipulating. Narcissists use manipulation and controlling habits. They draw of their victims by first making an attempt to please and impress you, however quickly, their wants will come first. Narcissists attempt to preserve their victims shut to keep up management, and they’re going to exploit others to achieve one thing they need.

Divorce implies that their ex-spouse has escaped their manipulative grasp, they usually suppose they need to be punished. To exert management over their ex, narcissists will use their kids as pawns to frustrate and hurt them. Narcissists are supreme manipulators and won’t cease alienating the opposite mum or dad, tearing their kids aside.

Lack of empathy for others. Narcissists are unwilling or unable to empathize with different folks, selecting as an alternative to disregard their desires, wants, and emotions. Their lack of empathy makes narcissists not take accountability for his or her actions.

Kids of narcissists, particularly in a divorce state of affairs, discover the controlling mum or dad utilizing them to get again on the different mum or dad and ignoring the truth that their kids want love and understanding throughout such a tricky time.

Narcissists consider they’re wholly justified in destroying their ex and their kids and don’t take accountability for his or her behaviors.

Instruments Narcissistic Mother and father Use

Sadly for youngsters, having a narcissistic mum or dad in a divorce state of affairs harms them and is a type of youngster abuse. The offending narcissistic mum or dad could make the most of quite a lot of instruments to hurt their ex utilizing their kids.


Triangulation is an ordinary manipulative instrument that happens when the offending mum or dad vents to the youngsters, inflicting them to bear the burden of the battle, and typically makes use of the youngsters to spy on the opposite mum or dad. Being always advised nasty issues in regards to the different mum or dad and spying on them units the youngsters up for abandonment and attachment issues.

One other instrument a narcissistic mum or dad could make use of contains gaslighting, the place the offending mum or dad distorts and denies actuality whereas additionally making the youngsters really feel the necessity to defend the opposite mum or dad. When the youngsters do attempt to defend the opposite mum or dad, the narcissistic mum or dad will manipulate them again into their fold. The battle the youngsters really feel is overwhelming.

There are as many instruments {that a} narcissistic mum or dad will use as there are kids whose development is stunted by their habits.

Ending Our Time Collectively

To recap, narcissistic parental alienation occurs when a mum or dad with narcissistic traits maliciously alienates their kids from their different mum or dad. The offending mum or dad accomplishes parental alienation by attacking the opposite mum or dad’s character in entrance of their kids.

Sadly, the vicious habits by the narcissistic mum or dad typically results in the youngsters disliking and rejecting the opposite mum or dad who’s harmless of the issues the offending mum or dad mentioned.

The accessible proof means that parental alienation happens in very tense separations and divorces, notably if there’s a bitter youngster custody battle. Sadly for the youngsters, the offending mum or dad makes use of merciless and callous phrases and behaviors, harming not solely their supposed goal, the opposite mum or dad but additionally the youngsters.

Clearly, kids who’re raised the place there’s parental alienation typically kind psychological well being issues comparable to despair, nervousness problems, and different critical circumstances. Their bodily well being may be affected as they could flip to meals for consolation and achieve important quantities of weight, or conversely, refuse to eat and develop into anorexic. These circumstances are solely the tip of the iceberg for the variety of bodily and psychological issues kids on this state of affairs face.

Irrespective of how the state of affairs unfolds, parental alienation is a extreme and unlawful type of youngster abuse that considerably harms the youngsters concerned.



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